THE VALUE OF STUFF

Within the next few weeks I am planning to have a yard sale, which means it is time to go through my stuff and there is a lot of stuff to go through. My mother-in-law is also at the same time going through her stuff and she too has mountains of stuff as well. Lately our phone calls have been about the so called stuff we have been going through, some of which to us have value and some we bang our heads for keeping so long. All this made me realize how funny people are about their stuff they accumulate through the years, cause lord knows you can’t take it with you. Never the less we all are victims of hoarding some kind of stuff to validate us for being here or because there is some connection to the past that brings joy and a smile to our face when we see that particular keepsake. Oh the treasures we find going through stuff.

I myself am not so much a collector of stuff only because growing up my mother instilled in us that if you aren’t using it throw it away but I do still have a few treasures from my past. I believe my mom was that way because there were so many of us and we really didn’t have the room to keep all that stuff which would explain why I am the way I am today, much to the frustration of my husband. I know I drive him nuts when I go on one of my cleaning tirades and I accidentally throw out something that was of value to him where I see it as junk. It has been hard for me but I have learn that what I see as junk and of no value may have value to someone else. So now when I go on my cleaning tirades I put my husband’s stuff in a pile for him to go through and let him decide what is of value and what is not. After all who am I to determine the value of his stuff?

My mother-in-law on the other hand is the keeper of stuff and her home is a treasure chest full of valuable keepsakes of her past. She has made an art of keeping stuff because to her they are a link to what was. I know when I go to her house and pick up an item there is a story that goes with it, which then what I saw as unimportant becomes something of value. She has become to me the family historian and the keeper of the family treasures. One may ridicule her for having so much stuff but who are we to do so? What may seem to someone as junk may have true and endearing value to someone else and because of that we have no business to decide for him or her what is junk and what has value.

There is one very important thing one has to remember about going through stuff, whether it be your stuff or someone else’s, and that is don’t be too quick to judge someone for what they deem as important. Don’t tease someone for wanting to keep their stuff because really how would you like it if someone tease you for keeping something you thought was important? In time people do come to terms and realize that some of their stuff needs to be gone through and will let go of what they thought to be important. There is one very important lesson I have learned in going through stuff and that is I will not push my husband or anyone to get rid of their stuff because I see it as junk. If I did that then I might as well slap them across the face and rip their heart out because to them, their stuff has value, value to them that is worth more than any amount of money. I for one do not want to hurt someone I love over something so trivial as stuff; life is too short for that.

So today I will keep going through stuff, I will sell what I don’t need and I will find a place to put the stuff I decide to keep. Whatever I decide to keep as well as whatever my husband decides to keep I know we will not ridicule each other on our decisions for keeping our stuff. I also know as we go through our stuff, my husband won’t decide for me what is important when it comes to my stuff and vice-versa. We both know after all if we did that there would be hell to pay and who wants that.