WHAT TYPE OF THINKER ARE YOU?

Yesterday my kids got me thinking about how people think when I was driving my daughter up to meet her dad for the weekly visit with him. My son on the other hand decided to stay with me this weekend and take a break from his father. On the way up to meet him my son said to me that his dad thought the way he thinks is wrong. That floored me, how in the hell can a kid’s way of thinking (and I am talking general thinking here) be wrong? Sure there are some kids that have thoughts of the morbid and doing harm to others and by all means that way of thinking is so wrong but with my son, who I think has the biggest heart of gold, my ex is way off on his thinking. So the whole conversation on the way up to meet him was that my kids wanted to know from me what I thought about their way of thinking.

To me my son is an analytic type thinker; he is always trying to figure out who, what, and whys of everything. He wants to know how things work, why you think the way you do, and if there is no order or semblance he will get totally loss. He is very strong in math and that is easy to understand because math is done with formulas and if you understand formulas then numbers are easy. He is also very big hearted. He can’t understand hate or hurting anyone person or living thing and will go out of his way to help anyone. Animals must sense this about him because our pets seem to flock to him. If he is lying down or sitting on the sofa you can bet one, if not all of our pets are lying around him, they really feel at ease and safe with him. I believe it is his easy-going nature he has about him. So to me there is nothing wrong with the way my son thinks and where my exe thinks there is something wrong with him I am at a total loss as to his way of thinking (I will get to the way my ex thinks in a bit). I feel very blessed to have a son who has a passion with how life ticks and love for life itself. Trust me I let him know there was not a thing wrong with him and assured him his way of thinking was the right way and not to listen to what his dad said about his thinking (I mean hell, aren’t there some Noble Peace prize winners that thought like my son, who knows he might very well change the world one day).

Then my daughter wanted to know what I thought about her way of thinking. Well I have blogged about good ole Morgan and her flare for the dramatics so there is no doubt about the way she thinks, she is a creative thinker (no bones about that). I swear sometimes with her I can see the smoke coming from her brain when she is thinking about something. Morgan is always thinking outside of the box and she has so many thoughts going on at one time in her brain that she has a time focusing on just one idea. One minute she will make her famous “Morgan’s News” that she will post on her bedroom door to let me know what her siblings are up to (like her older sister getting a tattoo and not telling me) instead of running to me and being accused of being a tattler to rearranging her bedroom for the millionth time or changing her mind about a Halloween costume to changing her oh so creative Christmas list, all this can be done with her in less than half a day. She is also at a very young age of twelve, an entrepreneur of sorts. She has come to me with ideas of starting her own business from pet sitting, babysitting, to wanting to sell stuff (the last one she had accomplish to some extent when mad at her older sister one time took some of her make-up and clothes to school and try to sell them for profit). I also believe with Morgan she could very well one day be a fashion designer. She can come up with some really unique fashion drawings of clothes that would give the great designers of the world a run for their money but really with her I see an actress with her. She can get into character like nobody’s business (see my blog Morgan’s drama for proof of her acting abilities).

The kids wanted to know from me what I thought about their father’s way of thinking. For the most part with him he is an emotional thinker or what I call rose-colored, avoidance thinker. He believes there are no problems and if there are problems then it is not his fault it is someone else’s fault. When we were married we got into debt because of his thinking. If he wanted to play golf or hang out with his buddies he would go instead of using the money to pay bills or buy groceries. His way of thinking is if he put the bills where he couldn’t see them then there were no bills to pay and when the bill collectors called wanting their money then it was my fault that we had no money to pay them. He would also get so emotional over issues that he would work himself into a frenzy of tears and would just fall apart. One example of this was a FTD flower commercial promoting mother’s day, where someone sent flowers to their mom in another state. Well just the thought that his mom, who at the time lived in Florida and wasn’t with him sent him into a total break-down and I had to get the box of puffs out to console him and every time after that I had to change the channel when that damn commercial came on. It was also the same way with the TV show “Touch By An Angel”, for him the whole concept of that show got him thinking and crying rivers every time he watched it. He believes that hugs can change the world and everyone needs to love one another. In fact to him I was a very cold person because I didn’t hug everyone I came in contact with like he did (funny, a lot of times people that knew him would often run from him when they saw him coming because they knew they would get one of his bear hugs and that drove them nuts). His way of thinking is pretty much why our marriage ended because everything was my fault but for me I just couldn’t handle his way of thinking and dealing with an emotional cripple that had a real problem dealing with life and always needing his mom to help him deal with everyday life. Being married to him just plain exhausted me.

When it comes to me, I believe I am a realistic, common sense thinker. I try to look at both sides and see the logic in both or I see things for what they are and not what they should be. Life is what it is and it is what you make of life is how I think. I believe you should follow the law and if you break it then you have to pay the consequences and there is no gray area there. I tend to be old fashion in my way of thinking like I don’t believe kids should be given contraceptives in school because in sense you are giving them permission to go have sex. Instead teach them absentness. I believe not to live beyond your means and be grateful for what you have instead of what you don’t have. I really believe that God should not be taking out of our pledge of allegiance and if you want to pray at school or work you can. Lets face it, faith is important and no one should be denied that. I strongly believe in having morals, values, and working hard to obtained what you want out of life, something I think people today have lost the true meaning in with life. These are what I believe in and how I think life should be; I guess I got that from my dad.

With life itself you have so many different type of people of different cultures, beliefs, and their way of thinking, which makes everyone of us unique and adds variety to life. There are some us out there who are a bit extreme with their way of thinking to the point it can upset the balance for all and then you have people who bring calm with there way of thinking that brings order back to life. It would be nice to have more people who can bring order and calm to the masses with their thinking instead of having people who are extreme (today I feel we have too many extremists running things and is why we as a human race are so out of balance). We all need to look at how we think, view life, and how our actions are affecting those around us. Are we upsetting the balance with our way of thinking or are we making a better difference with our thinking? You may be saying to yourself that your way of thinking does not affect the world but really it does. Look at it this way, how you vote makes an affect, how you react to someone can change their day for better or worse, and your opinion on an issue may just change someone’s way of thinking or life for that matter. Our thoughts and beliefs somehow connect us all in the scheme of things and our actions do in fact result in how the balance of life is affected. So the next time you give your opinion, cast a vote, or tell someone how you feel, stop and think about your way of thinking and what it may mean by letting your thoughts out and how it will affect everyone else, who knows you may end up changing the world.